No! Don’t! Why’d you? Go Sit in Timeout!

When kids are doing something you’ve asked them not to, the first response I always get is, “I don’t know.” Hmmm… I remember my responses as a kid eventually became known as one of two: I.D.K. (I don’t know) and I.D.C. (I don’t care.)

Okay, seriously, it has taken me a half an hour just to get that first paragraph out due to two children constantly asking me for this or that. Okay, one is being entertained by PBSs morning children’s programming, but the other needs food, milk, and vast amounts of attention. While writing that last sentence, he decided to sit next to me, which means his milk must be gone, he doesn’t care for Cheerios, or both. Or perhaps he just wanted to sit next to me. Reading a child’s mind is difficult. Getting them to tell you why is even more so.

So, say, you ask them not to throw sticks at each other and the little one gets an evil grin on his face and clocks his brother on top of his head and then you pick him up and put him in a chair for a timeout. This particular session was obvious from the get-go that it’d be abnormally difficult. Fortunately, the child is deathly afraid of our dog (okay, so maybe not so fortunate for him) and when I threatened to bring out Lucy (our Great Dane) to watch him and keep him in the chair by asking, “Do I need to have Lucy watch guard over you to keep you seated?” he responded with a sob-filled, “Yes.” And so she did… for the next ten minutes.

Upon asking him why he was in timeout, he said, “I don’t know.” When I told him it was because he hit his brother with a stick, he said, “I don’t know.” After asking him if that was appropriate, he said, “I don’t know.” Lastly I asked if he would want his brother to hit him on the head with a stick, he said, “No, that hurts.” A breakthrough. Eventually I got him to acknowledge that his behavior was inappropriate and he apologized to his brother.

Funnily, they play really well together most of the time, contrary to what we’ve been told. They share toys, interact with each other, and laugh a lot… usually at me. I can take it. I’m usually doing something goofy or they just find me hilarious. But every once in a while, and it seems from out of nowhere, they decide to misbehave. I don’t know why, as I don’t ever remember having to be in timeout as a kid, probably because I was a perfect angel, but the kiddos seem to enjoy the time to cool off… most of the time.