Morning Routine: Dog Edition

Our dog, Lucy, has a regular routine in the morning. This routine drives me up the wall.

Okay, so here it goes. I wake up. The cat howls her little, “Feed me, I’m starving!” cry. I feed her. Then I refill the water in the dog’s water bowl and add food to the food bowl at which point she is now standing just outside the kitchen flapping her head around and scratching her armpits until I motion for her to sit. Food in its place, I motion for her to go eat. Using hand signals gets her attention so much more then talking. Time to make the coffee. Usually by the time I’m done dumping the grounds, grinding the beans, adding water and turning the coffee maker on, she’s finished eating and is now in front of the backdoor scratching her armpits. I reach to unlock the door, which usually signals her to sit or I wait until she sits before letting her out to go potty.

Of course, she doesn’t go outside to go potty, instead, she stands on the deck and scratches her armpits. This can go on for twenty minutes or so, which yes, I’ve just watched and waited thinking that perhaps she will go up on her own if ignored, but no, she just alternates between armpit right and armpit left. So I tell her, “Up! Go potty!” which apparently signals to her it’s time to start shaking her head violently, ears flopping back and forth, which if I don’t stop will result in blood splatter patterns everywhere reminiscent of a horrific crime scene. So I grab my outdoor shoes and go outside, which usually prompts her to go to the upper part of the backyard and go potty. Perhaps she thinks this is part of the routine, but I think it is all a ploy to get more attention. She is, after all, spoiled rotten. Or perhaps she just has really itchy pits.